Lesson from the Seven Dwarfs

Recovering from an anxiety meltdown of financial distress yesterday after paying some bills now and looming in the near future I took prudent steps to help quash the tide of dollars gushing down the drain on bills so I secured myself a position (part-time) as a cook for a catering company here in SF.

I met the gal from the Catering Staffing firm at one of the CCA's career fair's recently and filled out the application she gave me and dropped it off today. I got there in time to fill out more paperwork and have an interview with her, which was good since she met me at CCA. I was hired on the spot. That gives me more ability to sleep tonight. Yay me.

Thursday, I'll return with my two forms of ID and must bring in my uniform since they have a job for that day and "you never know" if they will need an extra cook. Otherwise I'll be on call during the week and weekends.

Well, what with my 6 weeks of NO COOKING I finally get a chance to recall how to light a stove and heat something up.

I'll work part time and possibly weekends to pick up some "lettuce". I refer to 'it' as lettuce so as to remind myself of my initial decision that It's Not About The Money. However, reality barks at my door like two hungry, angry pit bulls freshly neutered. The bills are still there regardless of my symantics. The dogs must be fed.

Like a good owner, I am hustling my butt back to remunitive work so I can buy a couple of collars for the damn dogs. At least I don't have to walk them at night.

New Classes Today

Today we started with Business Management from 7am to 9:30, then moved on to Intro to Wines. Like slipping on a comfy pair of house slippers.

Business Mgmt reminds me of where I just came from (law office mgmt). Its easy enough since it deals with things I'm familiar with on running someone else's business using their money! My favorite setup. Oddly, the business wasn't doing well so they sold it to another firm... hummmm. Oh well, I was tiring of it after 7 years.

From 9:30 till noon we are studying the intricacies of wines, vineyards, fermenting and other mouthwatering jammy spice, blackberry, cherry and plum stuff. The Chef says when we're done we should be able to bet anyone at a party what the wine is, the year - give or take a year - and whether or not it was barreled or bottled. Pretty interesting. We learned a lot about grapes today and the ones that we don't use are the ones you get in the store. Those are eating grapes or the grapes of wrath from the sun, african pigmy shrunken head stuff. Raisins. No No. No wine there.

Chef says by Wednesday we should begin tasting. Just think, how awful is it that for school I have to drink wines every morning for 2.5 weeks. I mean, I have to pass this class don't I? Oh, and the Chef also said we will be making our Own Wine in class! Cool. Who knew. My attendance record just zoomed up some more notches.

I seriously doubt that I will be making anything close to the bottle of Chateau-Neuf-du-Pape that Shannon and Lisa sent me when they went wine tasting down in LA but I'll try ladies, I'll try. (thank you again!) I'm saving that stuff for something real special. Like when I rondevous with them again for a good card game.

Well, I guess I'll go for the night. Gotta get up early and pay attention! La la la, la tee da... Yippee.

Let Them Eat Cake!!

I like this RICE pudding. I don't believe there is a shortage of RICE! I think its just China getting back at the US and the World for the hubbub over the Olympics. Just like the contrived Gas Shortage. Give me a break. The powers in governments (global) are looking to fill their pockets and try to find ways to panic the people by "inventing" these absurd 'shortages'.

So, with all that in mind, here's a delicious and nutritious dessert thats easy to make. I made it during my Contemporary Foods class.

Lemon Rice (that new dirty four letter word) Pudding with Apples and Cinnamon.

1/2 cup short grain rice
5 cups milk

4 Tbsp sugar
zest of 2 lemons finely grated
2 Tbsp butter

Roma apples work here or anyone you prefer. I used 2 for 4 portions. In an oven proof saute pan, cook the thinly sliced cored and peeled apples in butter with sugar and cinnamon. Mix with rice and milk and place in oven at 350 for half hour (depends on your stove or altitude) Check before the 30 minutes are up to give you an idea of how much longer you need. All liquid should be absorbed but bottom shouldn't be burned. When its done you can put it into a mold or rounded bowl and press down. Let cool a bit while you take some plain yogurt and honey and the zest of the lemon and mix for the topping on the pudding. Invert the mold or bowl and top with yogurt dressing, serve. Very healthy. I don't add the amount of yogurt or honey since that is a decision you make according to your tastes.

For those of you annoyed that I don't give exact measurements its because this is how you should "eyeball" stuff and taste, taste, taste as you go along to learn exactly how you want something to taste rather than 'trust' some recipe blindly. I'm sure we have all, at one time or another, followed a recipe to the letter only to be sorely disappointed at the result. You should also figure out how much of something will suit your needs. Like above, for 4 persons I may choose to use 2 cups of yogurt or 4 ounces per topping of pudding each. The honey (or brown sugar or regular sugar or sweetner) is just till I get the taste I'm looking for as a topping. If there is more pudding left after all the servings have been dished up then save it. You can always refridgerate and make fresh topping or use some favorite jam heated in a small saucepan for a topping. Its totally up to you.

I just wanted to give you a healthier alternative. Enjoy.

Math Final Friday!!

I'm toooo excited because I PASSED my final exam in Purchasing Math with an 80%. You may say, Oh Deb, how you've let go of your High Standards! I'll say a resounding No because I am notoriously NO GOOD at math. I know it. But I studied real hard. I have band-aids surrounding my head like a crown of thorns. Yes, my head hurts but I passed. I do believe this sets me up for an "A" in Kitchen Math since we had a lot of other daily quizs, a recipe project and more. I did good.

I quit drinking for 2 weeks so I could concentrate during these last two weeks and today I celebrated with 2 beers with my lunch and then had to take a 2 hour nap! I'm out of the drinking game. I'd rather be in the Ace-ing game anyway.

Yeah Me!! I'm happy.

15 Minutes and Still Nothing to Say

I've been sitting in front of my computer for 15 minutes waiting for something clever, witty, original, plagiarized, anything to put down on my blog and nothing comes up. I know I haven't written for 3 days or thereabout but I'm an empty slate.

I think the math stuff is wiping my brain clean of all right brained activity. Either that or I'm so left brain heavy that the right brain went on "tilt" and the doors locked. As usual, I can't find anything in my beensy little cubby hole room let alone the vast untouched spaces in my brain where I could hide a single key.

Every Day. I kid not. I "lose" something. I'm in constant amazement that this is even possible. My room is way too small for such unacceptable behavior. Yet, I'm always on the hunt. For instance, yesterday I had to make copies of some very important documents to mail. I went to the copy shop, made my copies, stole 3 extra paper clips - they were in a hugh container by the copy machines, so naturally they meant for me to have some - and brought them home, I needed them. I put the documents/paperclips on my bed and then got busy collating and examining all items for proper signatures etc. When I went to get the paper clips to mail them - they were gone. I was sure I had them on the bed but made a diligent effort to scour the entire room for them. Long (trite) story short, they fell off the bed on the carpet. I didn't think to look there since I placed them in the middle of the bed.

Then, a few days before that, I needed my own personal bath towel that I have in the room in case housekeeping forgets about me (which is often enough that I have my own personal bath towel). I know I have it. I look and look and never find it. Then the next day as I'm leaving my room I do a once over in case I've forgotten something and - Yes, there is the bath towel resting over the back of a chair. Who knew. I thought by leaving it out in the open I wouldn't lose it. Ha! Not so.

Its terribly irritating when you constantly have to waste valuable time looking for something. I'm getting to be very annoyed with myself. Maybe that's why the voices in my head are quiet. Hopefully, they'll get over this and come back out (or in really) to play and talk to me. The voices are the only ones I really ever talk to anyway, except maybe Glo in Flo. Hi Glo.

Well, now all I can say is that I spent 1/2 hour saying basically nothing at all on this blog. Maybe its nap time and I just forgot about it. Gotta go have a close look at my pillow. My brain is bruised from all the Purchase Math we did today in class. We took a 4 person recipe and blew it up to 150 people menu. That meant taking the 6 ounce slice of meat and multiplying it up so I know how much Mad Cow I have to buy to get rid of all these people. Piece O' Cake you say? Well then why don't you take the few sprigs of thyme I need in the wine reduction sauce bouquet and tell me how many bunches of thyme I need for all these idiots!! These People are getting on My Last Nerve!!!! (exclamation marks are free on Tuesdays)

Definitely nap time with a nice little blue pill for my rattled nerves. After all, I only have one bathroom for 150 people. Chef didn't think of that, did he?!

Days like this I wish the world was flat. I'd take a long walk right now... (just get me out of Math)

Kitchen Math is a Bad Dish!

Having loads of cheap fun in computer class these days. We started doing Kitchen Math. WTF, you say is that? Well, we try to do metric conversions from US standards. Why? As if I knew. I don't plan on moving to the EU anytime soon.

Actually, its so we can price out the value of items comparatively. (I'm beginning to sound like my Chef Instructor) Meaning, if Vendor A was selling a 12 fluid ounce bottle of pork butt juice for $9 and Vendor B was selling a 500 ml bottle for $12.75, and then that idiot from the uptown shop - Vendor C was selling quarts of this crap for $26 (like I'd ever buy pork butt juice in a Quart size. What an idiot!) Anyway, (gawd I hate vendor C) I'd like to stay in business buying my favorite hi-volume product so who should I buy from that will save me money?

No one will tell me how to convert 1 bunch of cilantro from US to Metric. Iceholes all of them!

The other fun thing is figuring out how much carrots cost me to buy by the weight oz, the lb., a cup (diced) and a Quart (same dice), when I buy the 25 lb bag of carrots for $14.95 a pound. Its a laugh a minute in this class. I told the chef that after 3 hours of this torture my head hurt like a serious hangover. I go in feeling fine and come out feeling like I was the only one in a hammer fight without the hammer.

I might start drinking coffee again. This class is like a giant valium. I hate math. I had to cheat on my final in High School and I still got a D. Well there you have it. I just dished up a secret from my past for dessert. How much did that cost me?!

Happy Tax Day. NOT!

Its April 15th whether you like it or not. For some reason, being unemployed for 10 months last year I STILL have to pay taxes! I just don't get the reasoning behind Govn't "benefits". The photo Explains everything about where my "refund" is going.

Martini time. Must rush off.....

New Neighbor Highlights

[this post may disturb senstitive stomaches] it did mine momentarialy (read, for about 10 minutes)

Since I have no COOKING news, I do however have a new set of neighbors as of today. Earlier this evening as I was finishing up my culinary resume I heard this oldster yabbering about not being able to open the door to the room next door with his plastic key card. I felt compelled to help, opened my door and showed him how to use it. He thanked me and he and his antique buddy entered room 207 (next to room 206 which is mine.)

As you may recall in previous emails, I occasionally mention the antics and bothersomeness of my temporary (but miserable) "neighbors".

I could only guess what my little buddies next door were here for. My thoughts followed this line of thinking: a) A funeral b) A class reunion of 8 remaining members or c) An organ donor party.

Neighbor 'A' was the key challenged fellow and neighbor 'B' is the dottering dear I'm worried about. Minimally worried I should add.

Not long after occupying their "suite" (after all, I have the exact layout, therefore it must be a sweet at the Oasis Inn) I was BLOWN away by the noise next door. As I have said previously, these walls are made from spit and toilet paper. There is NO insulation whatsoever. What can only be described as a serious health issue demanding immediate review by the Board of Health, was that I heard neighbor B (yeah, I could make distin-stink-tion from the sound of their voices) literally blow his entire intestinal flora at one moment in time. I'm calling this a medical case of Hat Raising Flatulence! The sound reverbrated throughout the building I'm sure as my room was clearly twanging from the explosion.

I think it did toss him off the throne. He started coughing up a lung immediately afterward. I started, as frantic as I possibly could, to light matches on my side of the wall. I did not want a scratch and sniff episode. I indeed think his continued tuberculotic coughing and eventual hurling was just a symptom of the initial balast broach.

It was astonishing. If not for its initial shocking value, I would not have considered blogging this unfortunate incident except for the previous mentioned fact that there is nothing culinary to blog about.

I think I can almost hear you also privately wishing my cooking classes were occupying my time again. Not so. I have 5 more weeks of paying attention to whom they allow in Room 207. Until cooking resumes, I give you farewell. I'm just a tool of my circumstances at this point.

Think good thoughts for me....and read the next 5 weeks of blogging with a tsp of sugar (or salt)

The Non-Cooking Class

Right now we are in a 1 1/2 week Software Applications class, aka computer class. For me it's pretty basic knowledge that Chefs will need to know when they have their own restaurants. It is hard to sit for 5 hours at the computer doing things I used to do years ago.

Most of us who are computer oriented are having trouble staying awake. I read the news, check emails. Our next class after this is Kitchen Math, something like that. Great.

No cooking. No cool photos of our foods, kitchens, trays of fruit or cheese. No Free Food. Nothing.

Gawd this is horrible. However, on the bright side, I may loose more weight since I don't really eat anything worthwhile until noon or 1pm. There's gotta be a bright side!

Computer Class Prez Bush Style

Well, well. I'm learning basics of computers for 5 hours. I learned how to change margins, do bold, italic and underlined type, change the fonts, ad nauseum. Opps, did I do spell check yet?!

What the heck am I doing on a blog? Oh well, they didn't plan for me too be that 'advanced'.

(yep, Prez Bush knows and he don't care. Just fill in the blanks anyway)

Gotta do this for 1 and 1/2 weeks. At least I don't have to struggle to avoid washing dishes. Which, by the way, also means that there will be NO COOKING during that time.

I want my money back now! For someone who LIVES to cook this is the equivilent to putting John the Baptist on some isolated island away from his flock to feed them words of wisdom (basically leaving them still hungry). I feel ya J. I know the pain.... Oh Lordy, do I. You just don't know if they're eating right.

We don't get to eat, we don't cook, we don't even get to wash a dish.

Ah hell. Life's over for a week and a half.

Spring Break Comes, then Goes...

I'm finding myself at the end of my Spring Break.

Time flies way too fast. The planet must be spinning faster than usual. WTF! Six months are gone?! It'll be no time before I'm a full fledged Cordon Bleu Chef. I am amazed. I'm not happy that the next 5-6 weeks I will NOT be cooking. I'll be in a computer class and then Intro to Wines. (that's an easy A)

I spent the week cooking at Mum's and Papa John's home. I was in a real flurry to make everthing I could and had been thinking of cooking. One afternoon I traveled to the Restaurant Supply place to buy the things I needed, like a portable propane burner and wok, some catering platters for a cheese and a fruit display for my upcoming debut catering my cousin Guy's art gallery's Art Walk for the second Saturday's of every month from April through September. I may get some work from that hopefully. I'm excited.

I made a couple of soups to warm the cold nights and I made a tomato meat sauce over polenta slices like a lasagne. It was my first time making polenta and it turned out, well, perfect.

I had a day at the Stonestown Mall, think Williams and Sonoma. I get a discount there anyway b/c of my affiliation with the Culinary School. [danger!]

I at least spent one whole day JELLING. Just playing on the computer, reading cooking books and magazines, and sitting in the sun outside in the yard reading my novel. One whole day relaxing. Ahhhh. Felt good. I still mentally reside on that lounge chair in the sun.

Last night, my cousin Guy and I tried a new Italian restaurant close to home that I found on the internet Citysearch. com site. I love that site. Whatever city you are in you can find things to do, places to eat, etc on Citysearch.com.

The restaurant was really quaint. The whole place was a mural of the Italian countryside. Campy but sweet. It wasn't very busy so our service was good, but the real show was the food. OMG! The Carpacio was the best I've had and made my cousin a believer that raw beef can be made lovely and delicious. He ordered the Calamari Steak breaded and topped with tomato coulis and capers with a dash of lemon juice. I ordered the Rack of Lamb with a wine reduction sauce. Really yummy. Our dishes were served with creamy polenta, a side of pasta which was very good, and fresh cooked veggies. Perfectly cooked to crunchy, not overcooked. What a treat!!

Then I came back to reality. I'm half-way through my schooling. Only 6 months away.

I am SHOCK (thnx Papa John)! It also means that I will no longer be living at the ever so lovely Oasis Hotel. Where the heck will I go then?! The frets and worries of the six month fever.

Isn't life just one heck of a fun roller coaster? Maybe this is the real life of a personal/private Chef. I'm adaptable. I'm sure all will work out well. Its just so tense if I really think about it. My IRA is translating into _I_t's _R_unning _A_way..... just don't know if it will last.

Eh! Fugettaboudit!! Doan Stress.