Ewww Food

I'm not sure if I should say this but after working with things like gallantines, terrines, pate's and such I'm pretty sure I'm cured ('scuse the pun) of eating them in the next 50 years. Its a personal thing. I just don't want to eat pure pork fat. I don't like squishing all the meats together to look like brown baby food. Adding some dried fruits and nuts does nothing to entice me to eat it.

Have you ever eaten Liverwurst? It's soft and squishy and formed into a shape. What was it before that? Have you ever considered the answer to that? It was most likely chopped up livers mixed with pork fat and grinded together over and over till it came out squishy. Season it. Big deal. I used to love liverwurst sandwiches with sliced onions and tomatoes with mustard and mayonnaise. I'm cured of my craving for it now.

Especially after today where I was squishing meat through a grinder, I have no interest in consuming softened meat. If I grow old and lose my teeth I'll go vegetarian. The whole process is long, tiresome, and exhaustive in putting everything together. If you take too long you have to make sure the meats are sitting in a bowl over ice so it won't "go bad". I don't like making food with that type of consideration hanging over my head. I don't want to make people sick.

The grinders are BIG. You have to make sure to ice all the components so the fat doesn't congeal in the parts, if it does it gets all bolloxed up. Like mine did today. Then you have to take it all apart, clean it out, ice it up and restart. You have to use your fingers to get all the squished meat from inside the big screw that holds things together. Usually you just flick it back in the bowl with the rest of the stuff. Its not like eating icing from a frosting bowl. Somehow it grosses me out. It also grosses me out when the person before me didn't do a good job cleaning up after they used the grinder. Meat fingerprints all over the machine parts. Meat stuck inside the squishing tube/tunnel thingy. Blech.

Somehow I still don't think of Oscar Meyer baloney as squished meat. I love my baloney sandwiches. And I still like Oscar Meyer turkey hot dogs. I guess if I had to make it I'd change my mind. Oscar Meyer is my comfort food maker. I'm just not gonna eat brown coldpressed baby food with dried fruits and nuts, nor am I gonna eat cold squished pork fat. Ewww.

Bull in a China Cabinet

Today in our Advanced Garde Manger class I had a little misunderstanding. With the Chef. Oh Boy. First day of class.

We're working in teams and FINALLY I have my best teammate, Phil to work with. I'm happy. We are all working on foods that will be presented in our restaurant on Friday's Grand Buffet. This means lots of smoked proteins, pate's, gallantines, ballantines and terrines. Google them if you want to know what they mean. Its late here and I'm not in the mood to keep typing descriptions.

Okay. Perfect example of where my mindset was today. (the previous suggestion to google). I was making 5 gallons of poultry brine whilst my buddy Phillip was deboning 4 poussin (the smallest chickens). Both of us were busy, busy, busy. I had made 1 gallon of brine when someone said I needed to make more. Well, the Chef had written 5 gallons on the board but it looked like a spelling for "poultry brine - sugar" We do put brown sugar in the brine along with salt and I wondered why he mentioned sugar so clearly but just got busy with my chores. Anyway, I was annoyed when I had to begin the process all over again, but got busy making what I needed to do.

I cooked both brines and chilled them with ice and had to leave the 4 pounder on the stove to cool while I began frenching lamb chops to put in a meat brine. (terrible shame. They should be heaped with garlic, rosemary, salt and olive oil and grilled)

Anyflay, I heard someone ax where the Poultry Brine was and I pointed to the stove and told them which pot it was in. About 15 minutes later someone else axed me where the brine was. Again, I said "over here, on the stove, that big pot". 20 minutes later I got another soundout with someone axing where the flippin' freakin' brine was so I said "Its in the same place it was the last time you asked me! Right here on the stove". As I said the last sentence I turned to see who was speaking so I could send a dagger beware glare and locked eyes with the Chef!! Some in the class were making those Oooohhh noises like you give out when someone disses someone really good. I quickly turned back around and said to myself "OH SHIT". I saw his face and it wasn't an "A" grade face. He even rolled his eyes and stuff. OMG.

After I changed my diapers, I collected myself and went over to the Chef and apologized telling him I don't know his voice yet and he sounded like a student so I just answered sarcastically since I'm not familiar with his voice yet. I told him it was the 3rd time I was asked about the brine.

Holy cow. What a close call. I definitely now know the sound of the Chef's voice. Absolutely.

Two More Classes to Go!

FINALLY our Banquets and Catering class is over! Of all the classes I've taken this one was a real bee-yotch. We were all little sheep having daily run-ins with the Head Tomato about one thing or the other.

I would be remiss if I told you about all the countless little things that was driving us nuts on a daily basis. Really. I love my school and Mr. Tomato Head is part of that so I won't degrade it with usless fun gossip and banter.

This blog would be more interesting if I did but I simply don't see the readership here that I see on, say, Andi's blog http://andisperfectgravy.blogspot.com/ . If I had that kind of readership I might be persuaded to bend my integrity and throw caution to the wind. But after a year of writing I haven't had more than....oh forget it. Less than a site visit a day does not move me to acts of hand written recklessness and disparaging remarks.

Come on peoples! Tell your friends to read my blog cuz Lord knows I don't have any.

One Tough Week

This has been a very trying week. We've had a LOT of work to do in our Banquets and Catering class. We put together a beautiful event Monday for our Career Fair at the Academy. We had a beautiful ice carving centerpiece that had the words SLOW FOOD etched in the ice and there was a ice vase on top of it that held Fall colored flowers. It was pretty cool. (slight pun intended)

The term Slow Food is becoming quite popular. It started in opposition to Fast Food. The slow part also means that you choose your foods grown by local growers and use organic and sustainable products. It is also meant to bring the family back to the table together to eat whereas fast food is done with everyone on the run going their separate ways. Its a nice concept.

As a class, we had to develop the food menus for both events which meant cooking for two days for each event to prep everything. The Career Fair was for 40 people and the event today offsite at a home for the elderly was for 100 people. Today we heated and preped as much as possible in class then transported it all to the site in hot boxes. The Career Fair was easier since it was all at the school in their restaurant The Careme Room.

Today's event was themed after National Hispanic Month so we had a mexican chicken soup; a mango/pineapple and jicama salad with cilantro and jalapeno's and lime juice; followed by the entree which was a breakfast burrito with chorizo, eggs and red bell peppers wrapped in a spinach tortilla served with rice and beans; and dessert was fruit empanada with a fruit topping and lime accented whipped cream.

I don't know why anyone wants to get into catering. Its way too much work! After the lunch was over there was the tremendous cleanup process which was made harder because half the class had to leave to go to their day jobs or whatever. The few of us left were real grumbly. We were in a cramped space, had tons of dishes, glassware, flatware and pans to empty and store for transporting back to school. Then unloaded it all and distributed it in appropriate places. Ugg!

I'm pooped. I can't wait till this class is over. I worked in what is termed the Back of the House meaning that I never even got to see the people enjoy their food. Its kinda funny though what goes on in the kitchen and what everyone says while we're working. We laugh, complain, eat, joke around and I have no idea how everything got done on time. Pretty amazing. I don't want to do it again though. Its a tough job. My feet hurt.

Duck Fat and a Danish

Our Banquets and Catering class is putting on a onsite banquet Monday, a continental breakfast and a lunch. We will be making everything from scratch. We spent Thursday and Friday prepping the doughs, preparing the veggies and being happy because we were in the kitchen again sporting knives as accessories.

We've prepared about 45 crossiants, danish, yogurt, granola, fruit jams and honey butter for the breakfast portion. For lunch, we've made ciabatta rolls that will house some nicely shredded Muskovy Duck with a cranberry relish and some mesculan greens, Soba Noodles with vegetables in a vinagrette sauce (vegetarian selection), Heirloom tomatoes stuffed with baby artichokes and asparagus in vinagrette and finished with sweet ginger dumplings. Our event calls for 35 people but we'll make enough for overage just in case.

We're even making our own fresh squeezed juices. Don't I sound happy, happy. Another reason is that next week is our last week in this class! We can't wait for the last episode of our own Prison Break!! The warden is pushing the prisoners to desperate measures. We could mutiny at any time. YEAH, that's it. Capt'n Bly! We're pirates. (oh my, I'm losing it.)

Back to Earth Lt. Sulu! (Star Trek talk) We have another event to produce Wednesday which is an offsite catering event at a place called The Bethany House. It's a retirement home for low or no income individuals. We'll be doing an early-bird buffet type brunch there. It'll be a feel good week with more time in the kitchen.

Hi-ho, hi-ho, its off to work we go..... Me and all the little munchkins cooking in the kitchens. What a Disney moment. I'm feeling so technicolor.

Grrr, Argh, Other Irritable Noises

Brief note: Too many things that shouldn't be written happen in our Banquets and Catering class. I'm in a connundrum. I don't believe in trashing others so I'm not writing much during this course.

Teaching styles are different depending on individuals and students are reactive in exchange. Let me just say that in one way this class is kinda fun, on the other hand, its pretty difficult to keep one's mouth shut. Entirely.

Oh boy... this is interesting.

I Have Obtained My Internship!

I will be interning at the San Francisco Chronicle in their Food and Wine Department! Wow, what a catch. Its perfect for me. The internship of 3 months is required by the CCA in order to get your degree for the Culinary Program. I'm so fortunate. It is a Mon - Fri position 9-5. YES!

For those of you who don't know, the Chronicle's Food and Wine department has a full service kitchen where they test recipes that they print for the public. I'll also be actively involved in learning how a newspaper section works, be part of the production team, help organize the wine and food parings and tastings, manage the wine cellar inventory, write articles as assigned and do culinary research and development. What a bonus position!!

I'll start on November 10th and the assignment ends January 31st. By then I'll have to have something else lined up as an official job. By that time I will also be a Certified Cordon Bleu Chef! Pretty cool. This year is pulling up quickly. I could say how fast time has flown but that's a tired old phrase. I'm a much different person now than I was a year ago, that much I can say.

I'm getting close to accomplishing a life long dream. That's pretty heady stuff. I'll just leave it at that. Keep your dreams alive.

Enter Banquets and Catering

We started a new "sit-down" non kitchen class yesterday called Banquets and Catering. You may already know how I feel about non kitchen classes. In case you don't I've added a new Cat-O-Meter picture demonstrating my feelings at this point.

So far this is a lecture class. [read: stay awake numbskull!] Our Chef Instructor has a looong drawn out voice that tends to find one figeting or engaged in little distractions that entertain.

At one point today I had to sneeze so I grabbed a napkin from my sausage, egg and potato tortilla wrap, (which kept me busy and awake for a while) so when I sneezed into the napkin I heard two whistlely-squeeks come out of each nostril. Naturally, I thought the entire class could hear, which they didn't, so I laughed. Basically, what you heard was me sneezing then laughing. That in itself was pretty funny. Phil sure cracked up but then we are all pretty starved for fun in that class. (why is it no one heard my whistley-squeeks but they all sure hear when someone blows a gas-ket?)

Phil cracked me up when he was holding his pen in his hand, which was holding up his head, when he slowly dozed off and snapped up when his pen hit the table and flew onto the floor. That woke him up. I laughed. What fun this class is.

Then, I was doing some self entertainment of matching up my thumbs flat side to flat side and checking out which one was bigger than the other (the right - I'm right handed) and getting so drawn into that microscopic finger world that Phil had to push my shoulder to bring me out of the meditative state and back to the class lecture. (I really think Phil thought I was asleep and was jealous so he woke me.)

The purpose of this class is not self-entertainment but learning all about doing Banquets and doing catering. We're going to cater off-site somewhere during this class towards the end of the 3 weeks. We also will be setting up the banquet for a Career Fair which will be held at the Academy on the 22nd. So you see, the class has merit beyond vaudeville humor. But believe me, we need this childish humor right now.

SF Civic Center Goes Country

The downtown San Francisco Civic Center has done something pretty amazing. They are using grow food! All food products harvested from the site will go into the SF Food Bank to help feed those in need.

I think this is very forward thinking. Its received a lot of good attention and was the backdrop for the recent Labor Day Slow Food Nation fair.

I walked through it the other day to see what they were growing. There's squash, broccoli, onions, lots of lettuce, tomatoes, green beans, corn, and herbs. Its a real treat for this city dweller to see a bit of "country" nearby. It is also proving nice for the pollenators. I noticed a lot of butterfly's and bees at work.

As a Chef in Training, this is my Eye Candy. I'm proud of the Mayor of San Francisco for allowing this opportunity. More Cities should follow suit. Its all volunteer staffed by people who want to make a difference. I'm all for that. You Rock, San Fran!

Careme 350

The California Culinary Academy has its own public restaurant called the Careme 350. The students prepare and cook all the food for this dining spot. I had a chance to eat there this past Friday evening with my friend Jana and her two friends. It was really pretty impressive.

The buffet portion wrapped around all three sides of the room and each station had completely different food offerings, from smoked duck with a delicious cranberry sauce to pate's, terrines, smoked fish, meats, vegetables, soup shots, and any item you can think of. It was over-the-top! After grazing on this multitude of samplings we ordered off the menu. At this point we didn't mind that the actual serving portions were small since we had already quaffed the measure of a full meal. We weren't hurried like a normal restaurant and so we chatted and enjoyed ourselves and our wine.

There was also quite a display of sweets to choose from. Cheesecakes, mini fruit tarts, little cakes, things stuffed with sweet creamy wonderous gels and creams. Double chocolates this and extra creamy thats. We moved in on them like termites on cheap siding. It was fun. Shameful, but fun.

I gotta do that again!

Dollars into Dough

Today in Baking and Pastry my group migrated to the bread making. We made kalamata olive bread, baguettes, foccacia breads (2 diff kinds), bread sticks, and tortilla strips oiled with a tumeric oil for one batch and a paprika oil for the second batch. This was just for color. I prepped 15 large tortilla "baskets" to hold the mini breads. This was accomplished by oiling large flour tortilla's then sprinkling with salt and herbs. I used fresh minced parsley, minced rosemary and oregano. After prepping I folded them into metal mixing bowls to form a shape of a "basket" and baked them until they were browned golden on the top parts. You need to remove them from the bowls or they will continue to cook and bake.

When completed, we arranged the different breads artfully then we stuck the tortilla strips in between the breads so they stood up in lighten bolt fashion and then placed a rosemary sprig up in the middle for color. It looked great. It didn't taste bad either. (I had to make sure they were edible!)

We'll be doing this until Friday which is our competition day. We have to know all about all that we did in this class on that day. We, as a class, must complete the entire stock of what we have learned over these last 3 weeks. Should be interesting. I'm good with tempering chocolate now so that's out of the way. My blister from working with hot sugar has popped and peeled so I'm ready again for that. I LOVE making breads so that's no worry. I'm just not keen on the little bitsy desserts. Too annoying. I like cooking for cowboys. Big groups. Not them tini little thangs. I'm off for the big leagues.

Until then, I remain humble.....